Often I feel like I have a broken heart.
One of the things my heart breaks over is people I know and love refusing to receive God’s healing. In my mind I can picture what they would be like after receiving God’s healing touch for their emotional and spiritual problems. I envision what living fully for the Lord and prospering in their souls would look like.
Instead of enjoying this, I am forced to witness them living desperate lives of being in bondage as year after year they maintain hardened hearts and continue to refuse to go to God for healing. Instead they try to heal themselves, but only sink deeper into the muck and mire of this world.
It’s like I’m someone on shore watching as a life guard tries to save a drowning person, but the individual fights the life guard and chooses to keep on drowning.
Recently after receiving an instruction from a speaker on a CD to cry out to God, “Who or what do you want to be for me during this trial?” I asked the Lord that question about my broken heart over those who refuse to receive healing as I mourn the dire consequences of their refusals.
I want to be your healer, was the Lord’s response.
Even though so many people I know refuse God’s healing, if I sink into despair over this, I end up in the same place as them—far from God.
So I prayed, “Lord, please be my healer. Continue to heal me even if they refuse Your healing.”
Although those I love refuse to receive healing, I can receive healing for my broken heart–which breaks over their refusal and over my still unhealed issues.
The verse that came to mind recently and one that has uplifted me repeatedly is Psalm 147:3: “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” (NIV)
I like what the Amplified version adds at the end of this verse: “curing their pains and their sorrows.”
My mind can convince me that the only way I can be cured of my pains and sorrows is for my loved ones to draw near to God. He is convincing me that the only way I can be cured of them is for me to draw near.
Often I pray that I want to be more like Jesus. Having a broken heart over those who refuse to draw near to God is a sorrow Jesus and I share.
In Luke 19:41-42 I read: “As he approached Jerusalem and saw the city, he wept over it and said, ‘If you, even you, had only known on this day what would bring you peace’…” (NIV)
Even Jesus could not force people to receive, just as I can’t, but like Him, I can let go of the sorrow and be full of joy for what was accomplished on the cross. I can rejoice over how it has transformed my life.
I can choose to celebrate that because of the cross the door has been opened for all to draw near and cry out, “Lord, please heal me.”
Today I thank the Lord for the healing He has accomplished in my life. I marvel at how far He’s brought me. And I can see that He’s not finished with me yet—that the healing’s ongoing.
I will continue to pray that those I love will draw near to God to be healed, but I will not allow their refusals to rob me of joy or keep me in the state of having a broken heart. I will open my heart to God for complete healing of my own soul.
Right at this moment, Lord, I bring to You my broken heart, and I receive Your healing of it. And I will be still as You once again bind up all my wounds.
God is so good.
I heard the song “Healer” by Kari Jobe recently for the first time. After listening, the idea for this blog came to mind. Here’s the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yzejd6r9DwE