Lately a song I heard on the radio convicted me that too often I want what God can give me rather than desiring God Himself.
I want my circumstances changed. I want complete deliverance. I want prodigals home.
When I concentrate on these, I fail to remember all God has already done for me and in me. Instead of having my thoughts centered on, “What can God do for me today?” I can know joy when I focus on all God did on the cross and in my life since I accepted Him as my Savior.
I confess I sometimes feel God has let me down when He doesn’t answer my latest prayer to give me what I think I need.
As I contemplated how I want from God more than I want God, I thought of a story I heard a number of years ago.
A man cried out to God after experiencing a divorce, the loss of a job and other losses in his life.
“God, I’ve lost everything,” he said.
God’s answer to that man has stuck in my mind all these years.
“I thought I was your everything.”
The good news comes to this: even though I may suffer many losses in my life or feel my dreams are shattered, I can never lose God or the close relationship He wants with me—except by my own choice.
Today my desire is to be satisfied with the wonderful relationship I have with the Lord. How amazing it is to have Someone who completely understands me and helps me through every difficulty in my life. He gives me so much that I often take for granted: peace, comfort, guidance, wisdom, and so much more.
When I try to imagine where I would be without the Lord, I remember how messed up I was when I said, “yes” to Jesus.
This verse came to mind today as I determined to focus not on what I don’t have but on all I have because I know the Lord:
…I will be [fully] satisfied when I awake [to find myself] seeing Your likeness. Psalm 17:15 (AMPC)
The amazing thing is not so much that I get to be close to the Lord should I choose to, but that He desires closeness to me.
My highest goal is to have the deepest possible relationship with the Lord. I know now that in order for that to happen I need to want Him more than I want what He can give me.
As I think of friends in my life, I wonder how they would feel if I had the attitude of wanting a relationship because of what they could give me, instead of because I enjoy spending time with them and getting to know them and forming a closer bond.
What’s amazing about the Lord is that when things are amiss in my relationship with Him, He’s the one who helps me to improve our connection.
I look forward to being closer to the Lord in the coming days, weeks, months, and years than I’ve ever been before. I also look forward to learning in a deeper way about how to love the Giver more than the gifts He gives to me.
“More Than Anything” by Natalie Grant